《the hunger games-饥饿游戏(英文版)》饥饿游戏(英文版)-第84章

Peeta？　No；　itˇs　not　about　Peeta。　Itˇs　about　the　Capitol　and　the　Gamemakers　and　the　audience。　Although　I　do　not　yet　understand　Cinnaˇs　design；　itˇs　a　reminder　the　Games　are　not　quite　finished。　And　beneath　his　benign　reply；　I　sense　a　warning。　Of　something　he　canˇt　even　mention　in　front　of　his　own　team。
We　take　the　elevator　to　the　level　where　we　trained。　Itˇs　customary　for　the　victor　and　his　or　her　support　team　to　rise　from　beneath　the　stage。　First　the　prep　team；　followed　by　the　escort；　the　stylist；　the　mentor；　and　finally　the　victor。　Only　this　year；　with　two　victors　who　share　both　an　escort　and　a　mentor；　the　whole　thing　has　had　to　be　rethought。　I　find　myself　in　a　poorly　lit　area　under　the　stage。　A　brand…new　metal　plate　has　been　installed　to　transport　me　upward。　You　can　still　see　small　piles　of　sawdust；　smell　fresh　paint。　Cinna　and　the　prep　team　peel　off　to　change　into　their　own　costumes　and　take　their　positions；　leaving　me　alone。　In　the　gloom；　I　see　a　makeshift　wall　about　ten　yards　away　and　assume　Peetaˇs　behind　it。
The　rumbling　of　the　crowd　is　loud；　so　I　donˇt　notice　Haymitch　until　he　touches　my　shoulder。　I　spring　away；　startled；　still　half　in　the　arena；　I　guess。
¨Easy；　just　me。　Letˇs　have　a　look　at　you；〃　Haymitch　says。　I　hold　out　my　arms　and　turn　once。　¨Good　enough。〃
Itˇs　not　much　of　a　pliment。　¨But　what？〃　I　say。
Haymitchˇs　eyes　shift　around　my　musty　holding　space；　and　he　seems　to　make　a　decision。　¨But　nothing。　How　about　a　hug　for　luck？〃
Okay；　thatˇs　an　odd　request　from　Haymitch　but；　after　all；　we　are　victors。　Maybe　a　hug　for　luck　is　in　order。　Only；　when　I　put　my　arms　around　his　neck；　I　find　myself　trapped　in　his　embrace。　He　begins　talking；　very　fast；　very　quietly　in　my　ear；　my　hair　concealing　his　lips。
¨Listen　up。　Youˇre　in　trouble。　Word　is　the　Capitolˇs　furious　about　you　showing　them　up　in　the　arena。　The　one　thing　they　canˇt　stand　is　being　laughed　at　and　theyˇre　the　joke　of　Panem；〃　says　Haymitch。
I　feel　dread　coursing　through　me　now；　but　I　laugh　as　though　Haymitch　is　saying　something　pletely　delightful　because　nothing　is　covering　my　mouth。　¨So；　what？〃
¨Your　only　defense　can　be　you　were　so　madly　in　love　you　werenˇt　responsible　for　your　actions。〃　Haymitch　pulls　back　and　adjusts　my　hairband。　¨Got　it；　sweetheart？〃　He　could　be　talking　about　anything　now。
¨Got　it；〃　I　say。　¨Did　you　tell　Peeta　this？〃
¨Donˇt　have　to；〃　says　Haymitch。　¨Heˇs　already　there。〃
¨But　you　think　Iˇm　not？〃　I　say；　taking　the　opportunity　to　straighten　a　bright　red　bow　tie　Cinna　must　have　wrestled　him　into。
¨Since　when　does　it　matter　what　I　think？〃　says　Haymitch。　¨Better　take　our　places。〃　He　leads　me　to　the　metal　circle。　¨This　is　your　night；　sweetheart。　Enjoy　it。〃　He　kisses　me　on　the　forehead　and　disappears　into　the　gloom。
I　tug　on　my　skirt；　willing　it　to　be　longer；　wanting　it　to　cover　the　knocking　in　my　knees。　Then　I　realize　itˇs　pointless。　My　whole　bodyˇs　shaking　like　a　leaf。　Hopefully；　it　will　be　put　down　to　excitement。　After　all；　itˇs　my　night。
The　damp；　moldy　smell　beneath　the　stage　threatens　to　choke　me。　A　cold；　clammy　sweat　breaks　out　on　my　skin　and　I　canˇt　rid　myself　of　the　feeling　that　the　boards　above　my　head　are　about　to　collapse；　to　bury　me　alive　under　the　rubble。　When　I　left　the　arena；　when　the　trumpets　played；　I　was　supposed　to　be　safe。　From　then　on。　For　the　rest　of　my　life。　But　if　what　Haymitch　says　is　true；　and　heˇs　got　no　reason　to　lie；　Iˇve　never　been　in　such　a　dangerous　place　in　my　life。
Itˇs　so　much　worse　than　being　hunted　in　the　arena。　There；　I　could　only　die。　End　of　story。　But　out　here　Prim；　my　mother；　Gale；　the　people　of　District　12；　everyone　I　care　about　back　home　could　be　punished　if　I　canˇt　pull　off　the　girl…drivencrazy…　by…love　scenario　Haymitch　has　suggested。
So　I　still　have　a　chance；　though。　Funny；　in　the　arena；　when　I　poured　out　those　berries；　I　was　only　thinking　of　outsmarting　the　Gamemakers；　not　how　my　actions　would　reflect　on　the　Capitol。　But　the　Hunger　Games　are　their　weapon　and　you　are　not　supposed　to　be　able　to　defeat　it。　So　now　the　Capitol　will　act　as　if　theyˇve　been　in　control　the　whole　time。　As　if　they　orchestrated　the　whole　event；　right　down　to　the　double　suicide。　But　that　will　only　work　if　I　play　along　with　them。
And　Peeta　。　。　。　Peeta　will　suffer；　too；　if　this　goes　wrong。　But　what　was　it　Haymitch　said　when　I　asked　if　he　had　told　Peeta　the　situation？　That　he　had　to　pretend　to　be　desperately　in　love？
¨Donˇt　have　to。　Heˇs　already　there。〃
Already　thinking　ahead　of　me　in　the　Games　again　and　well　aware　of　the　danger　weˇre　in？　Or　。　。　。　already　desperately　in　love？　I　donˇt　know。　I　havenˇt　even　begun　to　separate　out　my　feelings　about　Peeta。　Itˇs　too　plicated。　What　I　did　as　part　of　the　Games。　As　opposed　to　what　I　did　out　of　anger　at　the　Capitol。　Or　because　of　how　it　would　be　viewed　back　in　District　12。　Or　simply　because　it　was　the　only　decent　thing　to　do。　Or　what　I　did　because　I　cared　about　him。
These　are　questions　to　be　unraveled　back　home；　in　the　peace　and　quiet　of　the　woods；　when　no　one　is　watching。　Not　here　with　every　eye　upon　me。　But　I　wonˇt　have　that　luxury　for　who　knows　how　long。　And　right　now；　the　most　dangerous　part　of　the　Hunger　Games　is　about　to　begin。
27
The　anthem　booms　in　my　ears；　and　then　I　hear　Caesar　Flickerman　greeting　the　audience。　Does　he　know　how　crucial　it　is　to　get　every　word　right　from　now　on？　He　must。　He　will　want　to　help　us。　The　crowd　breaks　into　applause　as　the　prep　teams　are　presented。　I　imagine　Flavius；　Venia；　and　Octavia　bouncing　around　and　taking　ridiculous；　bobbing　bows。　Itˇs　a　safe　bet　theyˇre　clueless。　Then　Effieˇs　introduced。　How　long　sheˇs　waited　for　this　moment。　I　hope　sheˇs　able　to　enjoy　it　because　as　misguided　as　Effie　can　be；　she　has　a　very　keen　instinct　about　certain　things　and　must　at　least　suspect　weˇre　in　trouble。　Portia　and　Cinna　receive　huge　cheers；　of　course；　theyˇve　been　brilliant；　had　a　dazzling　debut。　I　now　understand　Cinnaˇs　choice　of　dress　for　me　for　tonight。　Iˇll　need　to　look　as　girlish　and　innocent　as　possible。　Haymitchˇs　appearance　brings　a　round　of　stomping　that　goes　on　at　least　five　minutes。　Well；　heˇs　acplished　a　first。　Keeping　not　only　one　but　two　tributes　alive。　What　if