the wage of sin; and now and again she moaned。 Elisha had not lookedup when she came in; and he prayed in silence: sweat stood on his brow。 Sister McCandless andSister Price cried out every now and again: ‘Yes; Lord!’ or: ‘Bless your name; Jesus!’ And hisfather prayed; his head lifted up and his voice going on like a distant mountain stream。
But his Aunt Florence was silent; he wondered if she slept。 He had never seen her prayingin a church before。 He knew that different people prayed in different ways: has his aunt alwaysprayed in such a silence? His mother; too; was silent; but he had seen her pray before; and hersilence made him feel that she was weeping。 And why did she weep? And why did they e here;night after night; calling out to a God who cared nothing for them—if; above this flaking ceiling;there was any God at all? Then he remembered that the fool has said in his heart; There is no God—and he dropped his eyes; seeing that over his Aunt Florence’s head Praying Mother Washingtonwas looking at him。
Frank sang the blues; and he drunk too much。 His skin was the color of caramel candy。 Perhaps forthis reason she always thought of him as having candy in his mouth; candy staining the edges ofhis straight; cruel teeth。 For a while he wore a tiny mustache; but she made him shave it off; for itmade him look; she thought; like a half…breed gigolo。 In details such as this he was always veryeasy—he would always put on a clean shirt; or get his hair cut; or e with her to Uplift meetingswhere they heard speeches by prominent Negroes about the future and duties of the Negro race。
And this had given her; in the beginning of their marriage; the impression that she controlled him。
This impression had been entirely and disastrously false。
When he had left her; more than twenty years before; and after more than ten years ofmarriage; she had felt for that moment only an exhausted exasperation and a vast relief。 He had notbeen home for two days and three nights; and when he did return they quarreled with more thantheir usual bitterness。 All of the rage she had accumulated during their marriage was told him inthat evening as they stood in their small kitchen。 He was still wearing overalls; and he had notshaved; and his face was muddy with sweat and dirt。 He had said nothing for a long while; andthen he had said: ‘All right; baby。 I guess you don’t never want to see me no more; not a miserable;black sinner like me。’ The door closed behind him; and she heard his feet echoing down the longhall; away。 She stood alone in the kitchen; holding the empty coffee…pot that she had been about towash。 She thought: ‘He’ll e back; and he’ll e back drunk。’ And then she had thought;looking about the kitchen: ‘Lord; wouldn’t it be a blessing if he didn’t never e back no more。’
The Lord had given her what she said she wanted; as was often; she had found; His bewilderingmethod of answering prayer。 Frank never did e back。 He lived for a long while with anotherwoman; and when the war came he died in France。
Now; somewhere at the other end of the earth; her husband lay buried。 He slept in a landhis fathers had never seen。 She wondered often if his grave was marked—if there stood over it; asin pictures she had seen; a small white cross。 If the Lord had ever allowed her to cross that swelling ocean she would have gone; among all the millions buried there; to seek out his grave。
Wearing deep mourning; she would have laid on it; perhaps; a wreath of flowers; as other womendid; and stood for a moment; head bowed; considering the unspeaking ground。 How terrible itwould be for Frank to rise on the day of judgment so far from home! And he surely would notscruple; even on that day; to be angry at the Lord。 ‘Me and the Lord;’ he had often said; ‘don’talways get along so well。 He running the world like He thinks I ain’t got good sense。’ How had hedied? Slow or sudden? Had he cried out? Had death e creeping on him from behind; or facedhim like a man? She knew nothing about it; for she had not known that he was dead until longafterwards; when boys were ing home and she had begun searching for Frank’s face in thestreets。 It was the woman with whom he had lived who had told her; for Frank had given thiswoman’s name as his next…of…kin。 The woman; having told her; had not known what else to say;and she stared at Florence in simple…minded pity。 This made Florence furious; and she barelymurmured: ‘Thank you;’ before she turned away。 She hated Frank for making this woman officialwitness to her humiliation。 And she wondered again what Frank had seen in this woman; who;though she was younger than Florence; had never been so pretty; and who drank all the time; andwho was seen with many men。
But it had been from the first her great mistake—to meet him; to marry him; to love him asshe so bitterly had。 Looking at his face; it sometimes came to her that all women had been cursedfrom the cradle; all; in one fashion or another; being given the same cruel destiny; born to sufferthe weight of men。 Frank claimed that she got it all wrong side up: it was men who sufferedbecause they had to put up with the ways of women—and this from the time that they were bornuntil the day they died。 But it was she who was right; she knew; with Frank she had always beenright; and it had not been her fault that Frank was the way he was; determined to live and die amon nigger。
But he was always swearing that he would do better; it was; perhaps; the brutality of hispenitence that had kept them together for so long。 There was something in her which loved to seehim bow—when he came home; stinking with whisky; and crept with tears into her arms。 Then he;so ultimately master; was mastered。 And holding him in her arms while; finally; he slept; shethought with the sensations of luxury and power: ‘But there’s a lots of good in Frank。 I just got tobe patient and he’ll e along all right。’ To ‘e along’ meant that he would change his waysand consent to be the husband she had traveled so far to find。 It was he who; unforgivably; taughther that there are people in the world for whom ‘ing along’ is a perpetual process; people whoare destin
小说推荐
- 在细雨中呼喊
- (﹏(﹏╯在细雨中呼喊余华中文版自序就这样,我和一个家庭再次相遇,和他们的所见所闻再次相遇,也和他们的欢乐和痛苦再次相遇。我感到自己正在逐渐地加入到他们的生活之中,有时侯我幸运地听到了他们内心的声音,他们的叹息喊叫,他们的哭泣之声和他们的微笑。接下来,我就会获得应有的权利,去重新理解他们的命运的权利
- 最新章:第49章
- 高山上的泪痕
- =书名:高山上的泪痕作者:陈冠先【内容简介】吉玛淡月,出生在一妻多夫的少数民族旧制里,父子同妻,兄弟同妻,朋友同妻。上过小学的她,会日常汉语,算是族人女性有文化的人,却从未走出过大山,整日堆埋在永远做不完的家务活里。对外面的世界,一无所知。吉玛淡月,是位贮族姑娘,清雅秀丽,温柔娴淑的她,生长在青藏高
- 最新章:第42章
- 软呼呼的你
- 作品:软呼呼的你 作者:晨希 男主角:卫邵杰 女主角:张芊 内容简介 唉,这年头工作真是越来越不好找了 不过是应征管家,却来了成千上百个美女抢着要面试,搞得像选美大会 而以她身高一六二公分、体重六十公斤的条件,看来是没了指望 好在她祖上积德,靠着.一分的运气,再加上九十九.九分的傻气 奇迹的以压倒性
- 最新章:第26章
- 呼啸山庄
- 呼啸山庄人物表恩萧先生 呼啸山庄主人辛德雷·恩萧 其 子凯瑟琳·恩萧 其女,小名凯蒂希刺克厉夫 恩萧抚养的孤儿弗兰西斯 辛德雷之妻哈里顿·恩萧 辛德雷之子丁耐莉 女管家,又名艾伦约瑟夫 呼啸山庄的老仆人林惇先生 画眉田庄主人埃德加·林惇 其子,后娶凯瑟琳·恩萧伊莎贝拉·林惇 其女,后嫁希刺克厉夫凯瑟
- 最新章:第73章
- [呼啸]贵族山庄
- 《贵族山庄[呼啸》作者:客年 文案 林顿一直知道自己不是主角 但还是努力想要做个好人 结果直到最后,他才发现自己有多失败 那就回到开始吧,他想 这一次,爱情什么的,我都不要了 这是一个扑倒与反扑倒的故事 内容标签 西方名著 西方罗曼 骑士与剑 搜索关键字:主角:画眉山庄 配角 其它:第1章 交易 埃
- 最新章:第61章
- 山上的和尚山下的虎
- 文案从前有座山,山上有座庙,庙里有个老和尚和小和尚。有一天,小和尚下山去化斋,老和尚有交代“山下的女人是老虎,见到你要快躲开”小和尚:好的师父!寅十郎:呵呵,我是男人。小和尚:师父,我被公老虎拐走了!老和尚:万万没想到,辛辛苦苦养的猪居然被老虎拱了!外强内强一直硬气时而装乖的年上小虎妖攻X外弱内强一
- 最新章:第61章
- 符文之子第06部封印之地的呼唤(上)
- 作者:全民熙(韩 第六部 封印之地的呼唤 68、霍拉坎 雪还是继续不断地纷飞著。通往大礼堂的路上,留有许多人走过的足迹,整条路就像刚被捕获的貂的皮般闪闪发亮 达夫南以前居住在大陆时,只看过一次貂。当然啦,那是已经死掉的貂。如果要再说得清楚些,那其实只是某个拜访贞奈曼宅邸的高官夫人,她围著的银灰色貂皮
- 最新章:第28章
- 皇上,本宫喊你回家
- -皇上,本宫喊你回家 文 唐叶皇上“我想拉屎”卞小冉额头浮现三条黑线“皇上,文明一点,你可以说你要嗯哼”皇上“咱们做点爱做的事情吧”卞小冉再次囧“皇上,含蓄一点,你可以说你要嗯哼”卞小冉站在花园大声喊“皇上,本宫喊你回家嗯哼”皇上无辜的对着手指问卞小冉“是上床还是拉屎*推荐新书《老板,我被吃了》链接
- 最新章:第140章
- 高山下的花环
- 高山下的花环 记不清哪朝哪代哪位诗人,曾写过这样一句不朽的诗“位卑未敢忘忧国-作者题记 引子在哀牢山中某步兵团三营营部,在赵蒙生的办公室里,我和他相识了。寒暄之后坐下来,便是令人难捱的沉默。赵蒙生是这三营的指导员。他出生于革命家庭,其父是位战功赫赫的老将军,其母是位“三八”式的老军人。三年前在对越自
- 最新章:第24章