《No Country for Old Men》第58章

s sorry　because　i　didnt　think　he　done　it　and　he　just　rared　back　and　laughed　and　he　said： where　do　they　find　somebody　like　you？　have　they　got　you　in　diapers　yet？　i　shot　that　son of　a　bitch　right　between　the　eyes　and　drug　him　back　to　his　car　by　the　hair　of　the　head and　set　the　car　on　fire　and　burned　him　to　grease。
well。　these　people　can　read　you　pretty　good。　if　i　had　of　smacked　him　in　the　mouth　that guard　would　not　of　said　word　one。　and　he　knew　that。　he　knew　that。
i　seen　that　county　prosecutor　in　out　of　there　and　i　knowed　him　just　a　little　to　talk　to and　we　stopped　and　visited　some。　i　didnt　tell　him　what　had　happened　but　he　knew　about me　tryin　to　help　that　man　and　he　might　could　of　put　two　and　two　together。　i　dont　know。
he　didnt　ask　me　nothin　about　him。　didnt　ask　me　what　i　was　doin　up　there　or　nothin。
theres　two　kinds　of　people　that　dont　ask　a　lot　of　questions。　one　is　too　dumb　to　and　the other　dont　need　to。　ill　leave　it　to　you　to　guess　which　one　i　figure　him　to　be。　he　was　just standin　there　in　the　hall　with　his　briefcase。　like　he　had　all　the　time　in　the　world。　he　told me　that　when　he　got　out　of　law　school　he　had　been　a　defense　attorney　for　a　while。　he said　it　made　his　life　too　plicated。　he　didnt　want　to　spend　the　rest　of　his　life　bein　lied to　on　a　daily　basis　just　as　a　matter　of　course。　i　told　him　that　a　lawyer　one　time　told　me that　in　law　school　they　try　and　teach　you　not　to　worry　about　right　and　wrong　but　just follow　the　law　and　i　said　i　wasnt　so　sure　about　that。　he　thought　about　that　and　he nodded　and　he　said　that　he　pretty　much　had　to　agree　with　that　lawyer。　he　said　that　if you　dont　follow　the　law　right　and　wrong　wont　save　you。　which　i　guess　i　can　see　the sense　of　but　it　dont　change　the　way　i　think。　finally　i　asked　him　if　he　knew　who mammon　was。　and　he　said：　mammon？
yes。　mammon。
you　mean　like　in　god　and　mammon？
yessir。
well；　he　said；　i　cant　say　as　i　do。　i　know　its　in　the　bible。　is　it　the　devil？
i　dont　know。　im　goin　to　look　it　up。　i　got　a　feelin　i　ought　to　know　who　it　is。
he　kindly　smiled　and　he　said：　you　sound　like　he　might　be　getting　ready　to　take　up　the spare　bedroom。
well；　i　said；　that　would　be　one　concern。　in　any　case　i　feel　i　need　to　familiarize　myself with　his　habits。
he　nodded。　kind　of　smiled。　then　he　did　ask　me　a　question。　he　said：　this　mystery　man you　think　killed　that　trooper　and　burned　him　up　in　his　car。　what　do　you　know　about　him？
i　dont　know　nothin。　i　wish　i　did。　or　i　think　i　wish　it。
yeah。
hes　pretty　much　a　ghost。
is　he　pretty　much　or　is　he　one？
no；　hes　out　there。　i　wish　he　wasnt。　but　he　is。
he　nodded。　i　guess　if　he　was　a　ghost　you　wouldnt　have　to　worry　about　him。
i　said　that　was　right；　but　ive　thought　about　it　since　and　i　think　the　answer　to　his question　is　that　when　you　encounter　certain　things　in　the　world；　the　evidence　for　certain things；　you　realize　that　you　have　e　upon　somethin　that　you　may　very　well　not　be equal　to　and　i　think　that　this　is　one　of　them　things。　when　youve　said　that　its　real　and not　just　in　your　head　im　not　all　that　sure　what　it　is　you　have　said。
loretta　did　say　one　thing。　she　said　somethin　to　the　effect　that　it　wasnt　my　fault　and　i said　it　was。　and　i　had　thought　about　that　too。　i　told　her　that　if　you　got　a　bad　enough　dog in　your　yard　people　will　stay　out　of　it。　and　they　didnt。
when　he　got　home　she　wasnt　there　but　her　car　was。　he　walked　out　to　the　barn　and her　horse　was　gone。　he　started　to　go　back　to　the　house　but　then　he　stopped　and　he thought　about　her　maybe　being　hurt　and　he　went　to　the　tackroom　and　got　his　saddle down　and　carried　it　out　into　the　bay　and　whistled　at　his　horse　and　watched　his　head e　up　over　the　stall　door　down　at　the　end　of　the　barn　with　his　ears　scissoring。
he　rode　out　with　the　reins　in　one　hand；　patting　the　horse。　he　talked　to　the　horse　as　he went。　feels　good　to　be　out；　dont　it。　you　know　where　they　went？　thats　all　right。　dont you　worry　about　it。　well　find　em。
forty　minutes　later　he　saw　her　and　stopped　and　sat　the　horse　and　watched。　she　was riding　along　a　red　dirt　ridge　to　the　south　sitting　with　her　hands　crossed　on　the　pommel； looking　toward　the　last　of　the　sun；　the　horse　slogging　slowly　through　the　loose　sandy dirt；　the　red　stain　of　it　following　them　in　the　still　air。　thats　my　heart　yonder；　he　told　the horse。　it　always　was。
they　rode　together　out　to　warners　well　and　dismounted　and　sat　under　the　cottonwoods while　the　horses　grazed。　doves　ing　in　to　the　tanks。　late　in　the　year。　we　wont　be seein　them　much　longer。
she　smiled。　late　in　the　year；　she　said。
you　hate　it。
leavin　here？
leavin　here。
im　all　right。
because　of　me　though；　aint　it？
she　smiled。　well；　she　said；　past　a　certain　age　i　dont　guess　there　is　any　such　thing　as good　change。
i　guess　were　in　trouble　then。
well　be　all　right。　i　think　im　goin　to　like　havin　you　home　for　dinner。
i　like　bein　home　any　time。
i　remember　when　daddy　retired　mama　told　him：　i　said　for　better　or　for　worse　but　i didnt　say　nothin　about　lunch。
bell　smiled。　ill　bet　she　wishes　he　could　e　home　now。
ill　bet　she　does　too。　ill　bet　i　do；　for　that　matter。
i　shouldnt　ought　to　of　said　that。
you　didnt　say　nothin　wrong。
youd　say　that　anyways。
thats　my　job。
bell　smiled。　you　wouldnt　tell　me　if　i　was　in　the　wrong？
nope。
what　if　i　wanted　you　to？
tough。
he　watched　the　little　brindled　desert　doves　e　stooping　in　under　the　dull　rose　light。　is that　true？　he　said。
pretty　much。　not　altogether。
is　that　a　good　idea？
well；　she　said。　whatever　it　was　i　expect　youd　get　it　figured　out　with　no　help　from　me。
and　if　it　was　somethin　we　just　disagreed　about　i　reckon　id　get　over　it。
where　i　might　not。
she　smiled　and　put　her　hand　on　his。　put　it　up；　she　said。　its　nice　just　to　be　here。
yes　mam。　it　is　indeed。
。。。！
No　Country　for　Old　MenXII
小！说
ill　wake　loretta　up　just　bein　awake　myself。　be　layin　there　and　shell　say　my name。　like　askin　me　if　im　there。　sometimes　ill　go　in　the　kitchen　and　get　her　a　ginger ale　and　well　set　there　in　the　dark。　i　wish　i　had　her　ease　about　things。　the　world　ive seen　has　not　made　me　a　spiritual　person。　not　like　her。　she　worries　about　me；　too。　i　s