《No Country for Old Men》第53章

his　uncle　thought　about　that。　id　say　i　have；　he　said。　id　say　about　anybody　has。　what　is it　youve　found　out　about　me？
im　serious。
all　right。
i　mean　somethin　bad。
how　bad。
i　dont　know。　where　it　stuck　with　you。
like　somethin　you　could　go　to　jail　for？
well；　it　could　be　somethin　like　that　i　reckon。　it　wouldnt　have　to　be。
id　have　to　think　about　that。
no　you　wouldnt。
whats　got　into　you？　i　aint　goin　to　invite　you　out　here　no　more。
you　didnt　invite　me　this　time。
well。　thats　true。
bell　sat　with　his　elbows　on　the　table　and　his　hands　folded　together。　his　uncle　watched him。　i　hope　you　aint　fixin　to　make　some　terrible　confession；　he　said。　i　might　not　want　to hear　it。
do　you　want　to　hear　it？
yeah。　go　ahead。
all　right。
it　aint　of　a　sexual　nature　is　it？
no。
thats　all　right。　go　ahead　and　tell　it　anyways。
its　about　bein　a　war　hero。
all　right。　would　that　be　you？
yeah。　thatd　be　me。
go　ahead。
im　tryin　to。　this　is　actually　what　happened。　what　got　me　that　mendation。
go　ahead。
we　was　in　a　forward　position　monitorin　radio　signals　and　we　was　holed　up　in　a farmhouse。　just　a　two　room　stone　house。　wed　been　there　two　days　and　it　never　did　quit rainin。　rained　like　all　get…out。　somewhere　about　the　middle　of　the　second　day　the　radio operator　had　took　his　headset　off　and　he　said：　listen。　well；　we　did。　when　somebody said　listen　you　listened。　and　we　didnt　hear　nothin。　and　i　said：　what　is　it？　and　he　said： nothin。
i　said　what　the　hell　are　you　talkin　about；　nothin？　what　did　you　hear？　and　he　said：　i mean　you　cant　hear　nothin。　listen。　and　he　was　right。　there　was　not　a　sound　nowheres。
no　field…piece　or　nothin。　all　you　could　hear　was　the　rain。　and　that　was　about　the　last thing　i　remember。　when　i　woke　up　i　was　layin　outside　in　the　rain　and　i　dont　know　how long　id　been　layin　there。　i　was　wet　and　cold　and　my　ears　was　ringin　and　whenever　i　set up　and　looked　the　house　was　gone。　just　part　of　the　wall　at　one　end　was　standin　was　all。
a　mortarshell　had　e　through　the　wall　and　just　blowed　it　all　to　hell。　well；　i　couldnt hear　a　thing。　i　couldnt　hear　the　rain　or　nothin。　if　i　said　somethin　i　could　hear　it　inside my　head　but　that　was　all。　i　got　up　and　walked　over　to　where　the　house　was　and　there was　sections　of　the　roof　layin　over　a　good　part　of　it　and　i　seen　one　of　our　men　buried　in them　rocks　and　timbers　and　i　tried　to　move　some　stuff　to　see　if　i　couldnt　get　to　him。　my whole　head　just　felt　numb。　and　while　i　was　doin　that　i　raised　up　and　looked　out　and here　e　these　german　riflemen　across　this　field。　they　was　in　out　of　a　patch　of woods　about　two　hundred　yards　off　and　in　across　this　field。　i　still　didnt　know exactly　what　had　happened。　i　was　kindly　in　a　daze。　i　crouched　down　there　by　the　side　of the　wall　and　the　first　thing　i　seen　was　wallaces　。30　caliber　stickin　out　from　under　some timbers。　that　thing　was　aircooled　and　it　was　belt　fed　out　of　a　metal　box　and　i　figured　if　i let　em　run　up　a　little　more　on　me　i　could　operate　on　em　out　there　in　the　open　and　they wouldnt　call　in　another　round　cause　theyd　be　too　close。　i　scratched　around　and　finally got　that　thing　dug　out；　it　and　the　tripod；　and　i　dug　around　some　more　and　e　up　with the　ammo　box　for　it　and　i　got　set　up　behind　the　section　of　wall　there　and　jacked　back　the slide　and　pushed　off　the　safety　and　here　we　went。
it　was　hard　to　tell　where　the　rounds　was　hittin　on　account　of　the　ground　bein　wet　but　i knew　i　was　doin　some　good。　i　emptied　out　about　two　feet　of　belt　and　i　kept　watchin　out there　and　after　itd　been　quiet　two　or　three　minutes　one　of　them　krauts　jumped　up　and tried　to　make　a　run　for　the　woods　but　i　was　ready　for　that。　i　kept　the　rest　of　em　pinned down　and　all　the　while　i　could　hear　some　of　our　men　groanin　and　i　sure　didnt　know what　i　was　goin　to　do　e　dark。　and　thats　what　they　give　me　the　bronze　star　for。　the major　that　put　me　in　for　it　was　named　mcallister　and　he　was　from　georgia。　and　i　told him　i　didnt　want　it。　and　he　just　set　there　lookin　at　me　and　directly　he　said：　im　waitin　on you　to　tell　me　your　reasons　for　wantin　to　refuse　a　military　mendation。　so　i　told　him。
and　when　i　got　done　he　said：　sergeant；　you　will　accept　the　mendation。　i　guess　they had　to　make　it　look　good。　look　like　it　counted　for　somethin。　losin　the　position。　he　said you　will　accept　it　and　if　you　tell　it　around　what　you　told　me　it　will　get　back　to　me　and when　it　does　you　are　goin　to　wish　you　was　in　hell　with　your　back　broke。　is　that　clear？
and　i　said　yessir。　said　that　was　about　as　clear　as　you　could　make　it。　so　that　was　it。
so　now　youre　fixin　to　tell　me　what　you　done。
yessir。
when　it　got　dark。
when　it　got　dark。　yessir。
what　did　you　do？
i　cut　and　run。
the　old　man　thought　about　that。　after　a　while　he　said：　i　got　to　assume　that　it　seemed like　a　pretty　good　idea　at　the　time。
yeah；　bell　said。　it　did。
what　would　of　happened　if　youd　stayed　there？
theyd　of　e　up　in　the　dark　and　lobbed　grenades　in　on　me。　or　maybe　gone　back　up　in the　woods　and　called　in　another　round。
yeah。
bell　sat　there　with　his　hands　crossed　on　the　oilcloth。　he　looked　at　his　uncle。　the　old man　said：　i　aint　sure　what　it　is　youre　askin　me。
i　aint　either。
you　left　your　buddies　behind。
yeah。
you　didnt　have　no　choice。
i　had　a　choice。　i　could　of　stayed。
you　couldnt　of　helped　em。
probably　not。　i　thought　about　takin　that　。30　caliber　off　about　a　hundred　feet　or　so　and waitin　till　they　throwed　their　grenades　or　whatever。　lettin　em　e　on　up。　i　could　of killed　a　few　more。　even　in　the　dark。　i　dont　know。　i　set　there　and　watched　it　e　night。
pretty　sunset。　it　had　done　cleared　up　by　then。　had　finally　quit　rainin。　that　field　had　been sowed　in　oats　and　there　was　just　the　stalks。　fall　of　the　year。　i　watched　it　get　dark　and　i had　not　heard　nothin　from　anybody　that　was　in　the　wreckage　there　for　a　while。　they might　could　of　all　been　dead　by　then。　but　i　didnt　know　that。　and　quick　as　it　got　dark　i got　up　and　i　left　out　of　there。　i　didnt　even　have　a　gun。　i　dang　sure　wasnt　haulin　that　。30 caliber　with　me。　my　head　had　quit　hurtin　some　and　i　could　even　hear　a　little。　it　had　quit rainin　but　i　was　wet　through　and　i　was　cold　to　whe